Don't become an ugly Christmas sweater: Dodge the holiday minefields

It'll come to you...

Relapse traps sneakily pop up on any page of the calendar, but the 63 days between Halloween and New Year's Day can be the trickiest gauntlet to run. Sequestering in a bunker? Not an option. Here are nine tips for not sweating the season of celebrations:

1) Stay out of your medicine chest. Cough and cold season is here. It's especially easy to overdo the cough meds. In typical addict fashion, the think the dosage on the label is only a suggestion and if a small amount works, the whole bottle will really kick the symptoms to the curb. Not so. And the little buzz from an OD of the over-the-counter drug can lead back to the drug of choice.

2) Stay out of your medicine chest: Part II. Another relapse trap in the medicine chest is sleep aids. With the time change and extra holiday-season stress, sleep is a casualty of the calendar. Alcohol is a depressant. Sleep aids are depressants. The brain doesn't make such an exact distinction between the two and, historically, drinkers have used alcohol as a sleep aid – or excused their drinking by saying it helps them sleep. It isn't just the prescription sleep aid like Roseanne's favorite, Ambien. It's also the OTC one, and especially concoctions like Motrin PM or Tylenol PM.

3) Find sober celebrations. Not as rare as you might think. If you're timid, take someone along with you who might be even newer to sobriety. If there aren't celebrations, it could be time for a diversion like a museum or pick a dry theater and watch The Last Jedi. All the older kids are doing it.

4) Bail out. There is nothing wrong with the word 'no.' We were all pretty creative with excuses for our drinking. If you are even slightly apprehensive about an event, put the same creativity to use for why you can't go. And if you're busted telling a little white one… isn't it better than possibly challenging your sobriety? Real friends understand.

5) If you can't bail, bring candy. Seriously. Satisfying an oral fixation can make a difference. The taste on your palate will make alcohol flavorings less inviting, too. If you've ever had a beer on top of a candy cane, you know.

6) Never stay late if you do go. Our reputations as the last soldiers standing – gone. Be the first leaving. Everyone has seen a dreaded morning after, or the photos of the night before, and uttered the words, 'I shoulda left way earlier.' The more tired you get, the weaker your defenses become. My grandmother's rule was that nothing good ever happens after 10 p.m. anyway.

7) Go help another alcoholic who might be struggling. The twelve-steppers founded their fellowship on this simple act. Even if you're not a twelve-stepper or vow to never become one, give this a try. It works. There's a flawed thinking that the holidays are an inappropriate time to challenge someone who's challenged by drugs including alcohol. It may be the best gift you ever give the person with the disease of addiction – and the family around him or her. Inside every sick person sick with this disease is a trembling, sorry, sad person dying to feel well again. Invite him or her out onto the path to recovery. In the case of the disease of alcoholism, there's no worse time than waiting for tomorrow or the New Year. You wouldn't imagine postponing treatment for a chronic, fatal, progressive disease like cancer. Why postpone it for a chronic, fatal, progressive disease like alcoholism? If the worry is that it wouldn't be the holiday without that person near, what have the past few holidays told you about that… and what if there isn't a next holiday?

8) Breathe. The holidays are loaded with financial stress, family stress, traffic stress, cold-and-flu stress, and end-of-the-year work stress in addition to the normal, everyday stress of life. Alcoholics and non-alcoholics alike drink to relieve stress. There isn't a single stressor that is cured by drinking: There isn't one that got worse because you chose to just breathe rather than drinking it off the calendar.

9) Be brutally honest with yourself. The biggest charge in the holiday minefield is in the eight-inch gap between your left ear and your right. Nearly every relapse comes in the collision between reality and the five words, 'It won't happen to me.' Here's the very alcoholic reason why I still have Ibuprofen PM in my own nightstand: Because it won't happen to me, the second warning above is only for those other guys, right? Right.

By the way, these nine aren't just for the end of the year and the start of the new one. They work anytime.

– Scott Stevens is the author of five award-winning alcohol and health books, The A-Files: Alcohol A-Z DVD series, Alcohologist.com, and the Alcohology app for Android. He is a founding influencer of the world's largest medical portal HealthTap.  Image by Marina Gloria Gallud Carbonell used with permission.

Overcome two objections to an alcoholism intervention over the Holidays

This is the time for holiday cheer and family memories and Norman Rockwell-esque Christmas scenes with smiling families gathered around a tree or a fire. Hopefully, not both. The reality for families of the 20 million adults in the U.S. challenged by addiction to alcohol or other drugs is more like the beginning of the Grinch tale, than the end. (Watch the YouTube video or see the online article)

Holidays are a stressful time in addition to being a time of joy. Alcoholics and non-alcoholics alike drink to ease stress. The alcoholic can't stop at one. Or six. Or on his own. And how many times, after a tear-filled holiday or blacked-out Christmas on the couch has the drinker vowed: Next holiday will be better, I promise? It's part of the way we alcoholics protect our drug. We shove the quit date off to buy one more day or week or season. We make promises. And sometimes it isn't even that we mean to break them. An alcohol abuser can quit but won't… an alcoholic wants to quit but can't. Not on his own anyway.

They quit with help. A family intervention is one way to get that help.

Two questions come up: First… Is it Grinchlike to confront the issue during the holiday? (And it's the alcohol, not the person, that's the issue.) Second… can't it wait til the New Year?

First, it's not cruel. On the contrary. It may be the best gift you ever give the person with the disease and the family around him or her. Inside every person sick with this disease is a trembling, sorry, sad person dying to feel well again. Invite him or her out onto the path to recovery. Professional interventionists are especially well-trained to do this with compassion and understanding.

Second, There's no better time than the present is the antiquated saying. In the case of the disease of alcoholism, there's no worse time than waiting for tomorrow, or the New Year. You wouldn't imagine postponing treatment for a chronic, fatal, progressive disease like cancer. Why postpone it for a chronic, fatal, progressive disease like alcoholism? If the worry is that it wouldn't be the holiday without that person near, what have the past few holidays told you about that… and what if there isn't a next holiday?

Visit alcohologist.com for a replay of CBS Sports' Power Up Your Health featuring Scott Stevens.  Host Ed Forteau led a discussion on risky myths of about "healthy" drinking.  Lucy Pireel's "All That's Written" included a feature on Every Silver Lining Has a Cloud called "When alcohol doesn't work for you anymore."  Details on the third literary award for Every Silver Lining Has a Cloud and the first for Adding Fire to the Fuel also can be found on www.alcohologist.com, plus the NEW book, Adding Fire to the Fuel, is now available. Download the FREE Alcohology app in the Google PlayStore today

Welcome to Christmas 2.0

This is the Christmas 2.0 -- the first sober version -- for many people in recovery. Congratulations on the gift you've given yourself and loved ones and please pass on a little courage to those who are still working on the old version.

 

Five considerations about alcohol and the holidays

For those in recovery, sober is the only way to do the holidays.  For non-alcoholics, here's some food for thought...

Nearly half of annual domestic sales of wine and roughly 40 percent of higher-priced spirits are sold in the final three months of the year as consumers tend to drink more and buy alcoholic beverages as gifts or to bring to holiday parties and other special occasions. Then there are the office parties and gatherings of family and friends.

For many, abstinence is a year-round plan, and for those who may be concerned about their drinking, here are five fast facts about the season of drinking that demonstrate the value or moderation or abstinence.

Parents, not peers, set drinking examples. Much of parental alcohol abuse or the disease of alcoholism is only occasionally visible to the world outside the family. However, children get their attitudes toward alcohol by observing how the adults around them behave while drinking. Christmas can be stressful. Getting home, complaining to our partner and having a drink seems normal. But stop and think what that might be teaching your children – that alcohol is a coping mechanism.

Drink responsibly – you don’t have to finish the bottle just because it’s open, or even drain your glass. Know your limit. Once you’ve reached it, set the example. Also, when planning a family celebration where teens might be present, try to reach an agreement on rules for them beforehand. Don’t feel pressured to let your teen drink if you’ve already decided they shouldn’t drink before a certain age. And don’t feel hypocritical for drinking when you’ve told your kids they can’t. Explain that alcohol is for adults because their bodies have finished growing, and even then, there are laws about drinking and driving. (See nine more alcohol tips for holiday parenting.)

Alcohol adds calories. Many Americans worry about the extra calories from that green Jello stuff or slab of pumpkin pie. Put down the extra glass of wine and save yourself about 200 calories. If you drink a glass of wine before dinner, another glass with dinner and a sweet wine for dessert, that’s more than 400 calories in addition to the meal. If three beers help that dry turkey seem more palatable, that will add an extra 450 calories. (See more in this related examiner.com article.)

Company parties are back. A recent survey by executive search firm Battalia Wilson found that 91 percent of the companies polled will have holiday parties this year, a significant increase from last year’s low of just 74 percent. If you’re a business owner hosting a party, you have liability. For a former drinker struggling with sobriety, there is no shame in skipping a bash. Otherwise, if you’re an attendee, ginger ale looks just like a cocktail and may keep you from legal trouble on the roads, because…

More people get in collisions during the holidays. Twenty-five people die on an average day in alcohol-related crashes. Between Thanksgiving and New Year’s, the average spikes to 45 alcohol-involved traffic deaths daily. December is Drunk and Buzzed Driving Month to emphasize the dangers of drinking and driving during the travel- and celebration-intensive season. Motor vehicle violations involving alcohol increase an average of 54 percent after Thanksgiving. Twelve hundred Americans will die on the roads this month from intoxicated driving crashes. The numbers are higher in years when Christmas and New Year's land on a weekend, which they won’t this year.

Alcohol-related violent crime increases in December. The Department of Justice reports alcohol-related violent crime is highest in December compared to the rest of the year except July – which is a statistical tie. One-third of state prisoners and one-fifth of federal prisoners report alcohol use at the time of the offense. Twenty-one percent of federal prisoners serving time for a violent offense reported alcohol use at the time of the offense. An earlier study in 2008 by Pew Research revealed that 25 percent of state prisoners given a standard questionnaire to screen for the disease of alcoholism tested positive.
--from examiner.com (see full article)
www.alcohologist.com

Details on the third literary award for Every Silver Lining Has a Cloud, plus the new radio interview replay is available at alcohologist.com... and please read the new interview with Scott Stevens at Christoph Fisher Books.  Mr. Fisher is an acclaimed international historical fiction novelist from the UK.